The Weave. [A slow nod. Sorry, she knows she should be thinking of archaic looms and the potency of women's work combined with witchcraft, ala Ariadne or the Fates, but reality tv and hair politics conjure a different picture.] Sounds poetic.

To be fair, sounds like most things I know about don't exist outside my little corner of the universe, either. We could call it even?

[She holds out a hand to shake.]

Hi. I'm Camille. I'm a reporter, and I have no idea what's going on here.